There is a slight difference, but sometimes we aren’t arguing to be right, we are arguing not to be wrong. The ego has taught us being wrong makes you less of a person, while being right makes you the better person. I think both stances are wrong, but let’s look a little deeper at what’s really going on.
For comparison, first think about the way you feel when you want to be right. Stop right this moment and really think about how it makes you feel. It shouldn’t be hard to come up with a recent situation where you wanted to convince the other person you were right and they were wrong.
Now, think about the way you feel when you don’t want to be wrong. It’s not just a matter of correcting the other person or convincing them they are wrong, you absolutely cannot be wrong. You don’t really care that it may be a matter of perception, you might have heard something incorrectly, or your memory of it isn’t correct…you have just can’t own the feeling you were wrong.
If you pay close attention, there is more fear attached to not wanting to be wrong. Wanting to be right is more of a statement of fact. Not wanting to be wrong attaches more of a negative emotion to it. I think it has to do with the fact in one situation you are using the word “want” and in the other you are using the word “don’t.”
Here’s what really is the underlying issue, no matter which one is the reason. If you find yourself correcting others, or constantly seeing their faults, you are seriously having issues with a belief in lack. They have to wrong so you can be right, thus you believe if they have something it take away from you.
Interesting how deceitful our ego can be, hiding our true issues behind something else. The lesson here is- don’t take things at face value. If you find yourself doing something you don’t like, dig in and figure out what’s really going on.